Mike Rogers has outed closeted gay politicians who have voted for anti-LGBT legislation to protect their closet and power. Mike is a blogger, fundraiser, and new media expert and consultant and a Senior Consultant at the New Organizing Institute. The movie “Outrage” that was released in 2009 was based largely on his work outing harmful closeted gay politicians.
Mike Rogers, blogger, activist, journalist, new media expert and consultant at work on his computer
Mike Rogers, most feared man on Capitol Hill
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I’ll simply have to insist! A couple days in the last week when the snow had melted and I could walk along actual damp SIDEWALK…and then this last couple days’ vaunted blizzard being a “Feh, THAT you call a blizzard?!” sort of event for the now-ever-so-much-more hardy citizens who’ve been digging out from several feet, and I’m convinced. Yup. Spring! Maybe not THIS week, but…it’ll get here.
This spring at the Willliam Way center in Philadelphia my friend Pearlette Toussant is presenting a supremely cool event—which she’s already blackmailed me into attending because now that I’m dating again, girl has way too much inculpatory evidence which, while formally inadmissible as hearsay, could prejudice my case.*
On Tuesday, March 25 at 6:00, jumping off from the lobby of the center, to “Whet Your Appetite for Spring:” a walking tour of Philly’s Gayborhood to pick out all manner of places and things creatively includable in romantic spring date plans—but ahead of time so we’re not all frantic! Whee! This is also just a cool way for newcomers or visitors to Philadelphia to learn their way around and discover some amusing, healthy, fun and fascinating LGBTQ destinations, for Philadelphians of all tenures to meet nice people, and for everybody to enjoy.
*Anyone who knows me knows what a big lie that is; if I were a language I wouldn’t have a word for “overshare,” or “TMI”!** I love information! It’s all about the information…which reminds me to recommend, as well, Lisa Lutz’ shriekingly funny, like when you can’t help but yelp like a sea lion with laughter, Curse of the Spellmans! A lot more than funny, too, in its unsparing but ultimately nonjudgmental portrayal of a most non-traditional family. (“Uh, I request Mal Blum’s ‘For Making Art’ song plizz, goin’ out to Lisa Lutz…”) I hope the first one, The Spellman Files, is as good, since I’ve accidentally ended up reading them out of order, but I’ll let you know when I read it, which WILL be as soon as possible!
(**In terms of MY life I’m like that proverbial open book, that is. Secrets told to me, I keep to the grave. Serious as an aneurysm about that.)
This post is the fourth post in a series of coverage from the Midwest Bisexual Lesbian Gay Transgender Ally College Conference 2010, that took place Feb. 19 to Feb. 21, 2010, at the University of Wisconsin – Madison.
WARNING: This post is not explicit, but it may not be work appropriate.
“Like alternative medicine, some people think porn is crazy and others think it is the best thing ever,” said Allison Lancaster, leader of the session “More Than Meets The Eye: Sexual Minorities in Porn.”
Often times, in girl-on-girl and guy-on-guy porn, the actors are straight people simply acting gay, not usually enjoy the sexual acts and are performing their job of showing pleasure. These films are made for a male audience, catering to stereotypical portrayals of these groups (like always showing two feminine women together).
But in porn made specifically for lesbians and gays, the actors usually identify as the sexual orientation they are portraying and seem to be enjoying themselves.
Porn is a business and wants to produce what will sell. Straight men are the primary consumers of porn, so it makes sense that it caters to them. But that consumer standard is changing.
For sexual minorities, porn is sometimes an art and means of expression, and companies are starting to realize there is a demand for this sort of porn. Companies producing porn for queers and by queers are starting to crop up in the market.
This workshop did not discuss transgender people in porn.
If you have read my previous posts, it may surprise you to know that I have no problem with gay marriage. How can this possibly be, you ask, have you lost your mind? No, I have not, but I must be psychic to have known exactly what you were just thinking.
I have no problem with it because it cannot exist. Two same gender people can have whatever ceremony they like and call it marriage, but it will not now, nor will it ever be, marriage. It can only be a consecration of an abomination. Just as a rose by any other name is still a rose, conversely, a lily will never be a rose. Marriage is the union of a man and a woman with at least the possibility of having biological children. And the story of Abraham teaches us that even the very old who have given up hope can still have children, so the only requirement is one man with one woman. That is how the familyh is supposed to be set up. Any other setup is inferior.
So, if you want to be gay, be gay. And if you want to have a ceremony to proclaim your shared gayness with another, go ahead. And if you further want to call it marriage, go right ahead.
Your Wednesday night party just got hotter with your very own DJ COOKEE in the house come and dance the night away with her and your fellow queers. Remember doors open at 10pm and same great location STARLINE.
i created this meme at formspring.com where, essentially, people can ask me anything they want to know about me with anonymity. BAD IDEA! my curiosity and ego led me to create it and it’s leading me to leave it up despite the onslaught of negative questions. from this meme, i deem myself narcissistic and others inherently cruel. period.
Crush:
i’m crushing hard on this girl… really fucking hard. luckily… she’s down. problem: she’s “straight.” and, just had a baby…so she’s still attached to her baby’s father. but, the truth of the matter is… i could love her. tonight, she’s coming over to my friend gina’s and we’re going to spoon all night. lollerskatez. but… i’m cheesin’… i cannot stop smiling and her lips are so soft and she smells so good… and damn. story of my life: fall in love with someone you can never have. epic fail.
We visited Blush! wine bar last weekend. Cute space, cozy atmosphere – all that you’d expect from a homey wine bar in the middle of the Castro. A place for all the highfalutin flags to show off their abilities to order in French and their developed palettes.
The only problem? The menu. Perhaps I’m too young to fully appreciate foreign cuisine but when I order something called “kobe beef tartare” I expect y’know… meat. What we got instead could easily be mistaken for cat food wrapped in a cucumber. Now Wikipedia tells me that a tartare “is a preparation of finely chopped raw meat or fish optionally with seasonings and sauces” but I wish the menu would have told me that before hand. The other thing we got was the ravioli’s which were disappointing. They tasted good and all, after they stopped boiling so I could actually put them in my mouth without burning anything, but they weren’t filling to say the least.
Am I expecting too much? Maybe. Yet for $12-$14 I’m surprised these people can look me in the eye when they serve it.
I’ve never really understood how a woman could make love to you tenderly one minute, and wind up angry with you the next, without some bizarre happening in between. Call me crazy, and many have, but how does that work exactly? I can’t make love to you if I’m mad. But evidently, there are some woman who can.
Isn’t sex supposed to seal off the anger acting as a truce, like a white flag waved in the battlefield. For me, sex after a fight is passionate and forgiving all at once, reminding me of the sex you experience after a long drought of “no sex,” where your hunger trumps your tenderness, but somehow it doesn’t really matter, because it feels so fabulous you wish you could die in that moment, wallowing in ecstasy, since nothing will ever be that good again. Do you know what I mean?
Sex between women is usually more emotionally complicated, than the simple desire to achieve climax. It is a contract between hearts, a union of souls; or at the very least, a tender, loving gesture that can bring tears to your eyes if you’re not careful. Women move me. They also drive me crazy. So, what’s my point, you must be asking. The answer is, I don’t know. I’m reaching out to you for some wisdom, some guidance, a few answers.
For once, I am caught off guard and questioning sex and what it means at different times, and in particular, when one party is harboring some grudge or resentment. I had wonderful sex this morning and found out only moments later, that she was angry with me. She pouted while getting dressed, and gave me the cold shoulder. When I asked her what was up, she said we’d talk about it later, in that tone of voice that means you’re in trouble.
All I can figure is that I must have been very bad while I was asleep, since the last time I spoke to her before bed, everything seemed ok. Then, we woke up making love to each other. Sounds like a great start to the day, doesn’t it. But, to my surprise, moments later I found out she was angry about something.
Maybe I sleep walk and don’t realize it and got up and said something horrible to her, or kicked the dog, or cursed uncontrollably. I really don’t know. Because later has not arrived, and I am waiting like a child, uncertain of my punishment, or what I did or said that evoked such a negative vibe. You see, being sensitive is good and bad. I feel everything too much. This is my life. Yikes! Any kindred spirits out there who can give me some advice.
I am humbled by my lack of understanding of lesbians. Considering I am a lesbian and have played for that team for a couple of decades now, you would think I’d have some answers. But I’d rather go with the idea that true brilliance means you are aware of how very little you truly know, in which case I’m a genius.
before some dumbass pulled a knife on somebody over a parking spot. this is today’s new neighborhood development.
yup, some dude moved someone else’s chair and parked in his spot. we saw cop cars and asked what was going on. like i keep saying: respect the chair. [or the cone, milkcrate, dining room set, coffee table (yes, saw one of those today) or, my new favorite, a laundry basket full of snow with a pink foam floaty noodle sticking out of it.] respect it or you might get cut. at least in baltimore. so beware.
I waited 20 minutes for the Muni train to work yesterday. San Francisco is in a major budget crisis, so they have had to cut lines and frequency of trains. “Budget crisis” seemed abstract, until I found myself waiting and waiting in fog so thick it felt like gravity-defying rain. I stood between two older Asian men, taking shelter in the venn diagram of their umbrellas brushing together above my head. When it finally arrived Muni was packed with students on their way to school – I had to wedge myself in a corner between three skinny girls and their enormous backpacks.
They all had long brown hair, wore high-top sneakers and little heart shaped earrings. One sported thick glasses, one wore electric-colored makeup, and the third was clearly In Charge, telling the latest news at a rapid mumble -
“You know that girl we thought was a dude? Well, she’s a girl for sure, I saw her in the locker room”
“For reals?” Electric Makeup leans in closer.
“For reals.”
“Did she have boobs?”
“Yeah – little ones”
They giggle.
“You seen this girl?”
They turn to Glasses Girl, who shakes her head.
“Well, maybe you just thought she was 100% dude and didn’t even notice something was up. She so looks like a dude it’s crazy man.”
“How does she look like a dude if she’s a girl?” Glasses girl wonders.
“Well, she wears guys gym shoes every day” says Electric Makeup.
“Yeah, and these baggy jeans, and a, a big tee shirt, so, you can’t, you know, see anything” In Charge adds. They have clearly given this a lot of thought.
“That’s weird”
“Weird-o-weird”
“I know. I wonder what her problem is. Like, maybe no one’s told her what girls are supposed to wear?”
“Or maybe her family is really poor and she has to wear her brothers’ hand-me-downs”
“Or maybe she’s a lesbian”
They giggle, moving toward the exit.
“Let’s ask her at lunch!”
If I obsess, I can deflect from being honest with my feelings. If I let worry take over my mind, I can stay with anxiety rather than admit what is going on for me emotionally. I leave in less than 10-hours to go out of town with the woman who I’ve known and slept with since June off an on… We have not talked much in the last two weeks. I think it is because she is too busy with 2.5 jobs, jockeying for her dream job next week, and probably doing a little cave-like self-protection. Flights will not be feasible for her, and will only be so about 4 times per year for me. I still hold that we will remain friends, and that is a hell of a lot more than we were last year.
I like her. I care about her. I probably love her. I’m not “in love” with her, because I don’t get that reciprocal vibe from her. Some of this stuff (distinctions) comes from how culturally different she and I are fundamentally. I feel more genetically similar to my Dad who is Italian, and so I feel like a lover. I’m effusive and nurturing. Not a caretaker, but someone who likes to make others happy and feel good after some time has passed.
I’m intrigued to see what will be the context of our convos tonight. It is easy for me to keep my mouth shut, so I don’t think it will be that emotional on my end. I do wonder how she will approach me. Will she tell me that I’m dangerous? Easy to be with? Or will she fall back on “Don’t fall in love with me.” If the latter occurs, I’m going to ask her why she feels the need to say that.
I left my Politics of Gay Families class today pretty upset. It was one of the first times where I felt like the minority, and it was one of the first times where I felt that shutting up was probably my best option.
We had an assignment where we had to review several different websites, some which were pro-GLBT and some which were anti-GLBT. Almost all of the anti-GLBT websites were supported by “Pro-Family” Conservative Evangelical Christian organizations. As I sat in the class, people snickered and generalized (can you tell I live in New England?) as we went through the websites. Some people made it seem like Christians believe that exorcisms are necessary to “fix” people who are Gay. The teacher asked a student to open her phone and dial a help-line from an anti-GLBT website to try and find a counselor from Connecticut. The class was thrilled with the prospect and sat grinning while the girl talked to the guy on the other side of the line.Fortunately the man on the other end of the line wasn’t hired for his conversational skills and stuck with his job of connecting people with therapists. The class snowballed and I sat rather stone-faced.
It wasn’t that I disagreed with the general class sentiment towards the outlandish ideas proposed by these websites, it was that they were sneering in the same way that the conservatives were sneering at them. Everyone’s walking around with their fists up, trying to make the “other side” (as if there are only two sides) seem mad. I suppose I should have expected this, but it was frustrating nonetheless and I found myself facing what I am sure many others have faced before- whether it was a gay man facing an angry judgmental church, or a loving Christian facing a hornet’s nest of upset intolerant GLBT folks.
Fittingly, I sat down this afternoon and my friend at Faith Autopsy posted a link to an article on another perspective on homosexuality. In the 11 pages, we are taken through a journey (reminiscent of Andrew Marin’s book) that essentially says the traditionalist and open/affirming churches are both getting it wrong. The traditionalist churches are not providing room or guidance to GLBT people who wish to pursue celibacy and instead have been offering false solutions that cover up deep issues. The open/affirming churches are raising their voices but are not providing the guidance that helps any couple live in a God honoring relationship. I am not condoning either approach, and I wish to remain unlabeled for now- because I find labels (conservative, liberal, traditional, etc.) extremely limiting and inhibiting. But I will say that the paper mentioned above was well written and had many valid points which any one interested in this topic should take the time to think about and chew on.
The kicker is that I can’t avoid this conversation, even if I wanted to. Ashley and I are headed to Northampton where we’ll be facing things like this by default. We want to face it, but sometimes I just shrink down in my chair and wish things were just black and white. The reality is that I still have a lot of questions, and I don’t want a lot of answers. I want a few answers that are true, and I know that it will take time to find them. While I sit in between two hoards of people throwing stones at each other, I can only say that I agree with the small voice of those who say that conversation and discussion are vital for unity- a central desire and prayer of Jesus. Simply put, we can’t beat around uncomfortable ideas and we can’t beat the people who don’t agree with us. We have to talk, listen, and explore- all the while speaking and serving one another in love and humility.
Depression is anger turned inward. And goodness, you have a lot to be angry about!
If you are an average lesbian, you’re probably gearing up for a deep depression come Valentine’s Day this Sunday. You’re probably going feel bad because you are single on Valentines Day, or, because you’re in an unsatisfactory relationship. Really, you just can’t win.
But let’s set our relationship status or lack thereof aside for a moment and talk about what a wagon-full of donkey doo-doo Valentine’s Day is. Single or not, the pressure is so extreme to participate in this capitalistic holiday that you might experience increased feelings of self-loathing, or worse yet, try to buy some woman (who won’t give you the time of day) an assorted box of nuts & chews with the last of your food stamps.
Nothing says “I Love You” like a box of candy with aloof, slobbery nibbles on each and every piece.
And I don’t know about you, but something like that makes me pretty angry! So angry it’s hard to get out my pajamas and face the day!
Consequently, this is a call-to-action to my lesbian sisters, single, coupled, or swinging singles and couples: I want you to turn your depression inside out and GIRLCOTT VALENTINE’S DAY. There are countless ways to do that, and if you are mentally numb from a lifetime of sexual discrimination, I can suggest several things:
1. If you are half-way responsible and can at least been able to get a part-time job, go to your local pet shelter and adopt a live animal, rather than buying a Plush Teddy Bear with a big red heart on it’s chest that was assembled by oppressed women and children over-seas.
2. If you are lucky enough to have access to a sexual partner, cut to the chase and bang the living daylights out of each other rather than spending an excess of money and feeding corporate greed with a ceremonial romantic dinner at the Outback Steakhouse. (Although the Awesome Blossom is an excellent fried-food choice for emotional eating!)
3. Spend the day in rigorous self-examination: Why are you only attracted to unavailable women? Why do you fall in love with every straight female roommate you have? Why do you care so much about marriage equality when you can’t even get a date?
Personally, I’ve been saving my money to take the red-eye to Irvine California this weekend where I will wait by the stage door at the Bren Events Center. Eve Ensler will be performing in The Vagina Monologues and I’m determined, once and for all, to pin her down and find out why she won’t interview me about my vagina. And if I find out it’s because of those stalker allegations, I’m going to have a fit – they just aren’t true!
Sisters, I ask you, if that’s not the spunkiest way to turn depression around, what is?!
Sexy Hugs,
Doris
P.S. Might I note, the very first person to put my blog on their blogroll, was a gay man. (Bless your heart D Gregory Smith.) Sometimes I have to wonder, if gay men don’t do it, who will?
P.P.S. Jasper, our Pet of the Week, is still looking for a home.
P.P.P.S. Check back on Monday for a brand new post where I will unveil a soon-to-be phenomenon that will take the lesbian community by storm: The Make Out Date.
Sisters, I’m all about looking forward instead of backward during The Century for Lesbian Sex.
In a recent “Tulane Talk,” a daily email/newsletter that informs the Tulane community of Tulane events and awards, it highlighted Drag Queen Bingo, a Bingo event hosted by a New Orleans drag queen promoting sexual and alcohol responsibility. I was shocked when I received the email because I wouldn’t have thought that Tulane would highlight such an event. Being a southern university in a very conservative state, I would have thought that Tulane would try to be hush hush about these kind of things. I thought the administration would be scared to stir up prejudices within some conservative Board of Trustees or other very influential people. I’m glad they showed video of the event and promoted it because it shows that Tulane is somewhat inclusive of the LGBTQ community. However, I would argue this is the expectation to the norm. Rarely do I see institutionalized LGBTQ support on campus. This is supported by the fact that there isn’t an LGBTQ Director available in the Office of Multicultural Affairs. One was requested, but wasn’t approved because of the hiring freeze. This clearly shows the underemphasis Tulane has put on the LGBTQ community here. There is an LGBTQ student organization, but it is severely non-influential on campus. The organization as a whole has a lot to do in order for it to become the success I believe it could be. I ask myself, because it seems to me that there is a large gay community (specifically just gay men, not LBTQ), “Why couldn’t a LGBTQ student group on campus be successful and why hasn’t it been successful in the past?” I would also like to know whether or not Tulane has a non-discrimination clause including sexual orientation and gender identity. This is something I’d definitely be interested in looking at. I’d also be interested in looking at how inclusive Tulane policies as a whole are toward students, staff, and faculty. Furthermore, I feel that if anything is to be done to change LGBTQ people on campus need to get together and propose change as a unified group. Right now I feel like the LGBTQ community on campus is disinterested in each other.
Despite what you might have heard, this Wednesday INTEGRATION is still on for this Wednesday and every Wednesday there after so if you want to have fun and dance and have a great time them be there see you all there
Place: Finkelstein Memorial Library, 24 Chestnut St., Spring Valley, NY
Time: 6:30pm
Cost: Free
Info: HINEINI (Hebrew for “Here I am”) chronicles the story of one student’s courageous fight to establish a gay-straight alliance alliance at a Jewish high school in the Boston area and the transformative impact of her campaign on her entire community. The film allows the members of this community to tell their own stories. What emerges is a potent and inspiring story of Jewish pluralism and a community navigating the cross-currents of Jewish tradition and social change. Discussion with local Rabbis and a representative from Keshet to follow film. Keshet is a grassroots organization dedicated to creating a fully inclusive Jewish community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender (GLBT) Jews.
This film showing has been made possible by cosponsorship from: Rivertown Films, CANDLE, Rockland Family Shelter, PFLAG Rockland, The LOFT: LGBT Community Center, GLSEN Rockland care of Diane Schneider, Center Lane: A Program of WJCS & West Clarkstown Jewish Center.
Our lives contain degrees of narrative, story, plot, and sub-plot; each degree possessing many levels of meaning and substance. In the society we live, there are degrees of life that are defined, recognised, or generally accepted as normal (normative) or (if you will) the default.
The boundaries of what is considered normative in society cut a swathe through many aspects of being human: through the physical, cognitive, social, and emotional ways of being, even to how one identifies and defines themselves.
The language generally used to describe those outside these boundaries of ‘normativity’ is invariably negative or derogatory. The very word disability, for those outside perceived physical, cognitive, social ‘normalcy’, is to suggest that these people are without, or have little, ability (compared to those within ‘normalcy?). Groups that advocate for people defined as disabled, often accept and use this term to identify themselves. They ought think again.
Those who are normal to themselves, yet are outside the confines of what is considered to be normative, have, in my opinion, transcended accepted normalcy and gone beyond that specific normative.
The gay, lesbian, bisexual transgender, transsexual, intersex, queer… GLBTTIQ… the alphabet mangled identity of those communities are beyond a normative… they are beyond the hetero-normative – they transcend hetero-sex, heterosexual definitions of sex, and heterosexual definitions of gender (expression, roles and performance) and are therefore the community that is beyond the hetero-normative.
These communities have changed their alphabet mangle identity over and over again trying to be as inclusive, yet seemingly trying to identify each individual group in that broader identity. The GLB community became the GLBT, GLBTI, GLBTTI, GLBTTIQ, GLBTTIQQ, any number of conglomerations of letters and identities defining people who are all outside the confines of heterocentric normativity or like myself, are beyond the hetero-normative.
The South Florida Raging Grannies really rip CBS a new one over its biased Super Bowl ad choices. And the explanation for what CBS stands for in this catchy jingle is priceless. Check it all out in the video below.
As if the firestorm surrounding this issue wasn’t raging enough already, CBS partnered with Focus on the Family to create the controversial pro-life Super Bowl ad. Dun, dun, dun.
This is how the past two days have begun and ended for me. I’m taking a U.S. Government class (it’s a California state requirement for undergrads) as well as Law of Mass Communication which is a requirement for the journalism major. Suffice to say… There’s been a lot of talk and reading about the First Amendment between those two classes in the past few days. The content of each class pretty much overlaps, although the Law of Mass Comm. class deals with more of the specifics of what is discussed in my government class. On one hand it’s nice to have two classes so closely related that I get the broad scope of how our government works as well as the specifics of how it works (court cases, policy, restrictions on the government, statues vs. rules and regulations etc.) but its contributed to an enormous amount of boredom on my part.
It’s not that I’m not interested in this kind of stuff because I definitely am. As an aspiring journalist (whether I’ll actually be successful remains to be seen) I have to be interested in government and its inter-workings. Or at least stay awake and afloat in class enough to be reasonably well-versed if I ever need to be.
For example, when you know enough about government and the law, you are then able to ask questions about the facts to determine whether something might be unconstitutional or not, or at the very least, whether it will raise questions.
For instance, this morning it was discovered that someone had vandalized the gay and lesbian resource center on the University of Oregon campus. Someone broke in sometime between yesterday afternoon and 1 a.m. and spray painted a large swastika on the center’s carpet. Most people suspect that the vandalism is related to recent controversy on campus with the Pacifica Forum, although no links have been proved thus far. The Pacifica Forum is a group that is categorized as a “hate group” by the Southern Poverty Law Center for its invitations of holocaust deniers to speak at events and its alleged condemnations of gays and lesbians. Apparently the University of Oregon, because one of the group members is a retired professor, allows this group to meet on campus to hold discussions and events. This year there has been a considerable uproar about the group coming back to the school (although I do not attend UO I saw postings and groups opposing the Pacifica Forum on Facebook). Associated Students of the University of Oregon (ASUO) are considering a ban on the group in order to take a strong stance against hate speech and support student safety, according to an intern at Autostraddle.com who is a student at U of O.
So. What that all tells me and should tell you is that banning the group would be an obvious violation of the First Amendment (because the University of Oregon is a public school, and therefore controlled by the government). They know that. The most obvious argument to me against banning the Pacifica Forum from the U of O campus is that as a public university, the facilities used by the Forum are in default, a public forum designed for the exercise of free speech by the public. According to my handy dandy Communications Law textbook by John Zelezny, “…If a public forum has been created, government attempts to control the content of speech in that forum are presumptively invalid prior restraints.” Despite all this, from all accounts ASUO appears to be forging ahead with resolutions to ban the group (and potentially similar groups) from campus.
Now as much as I’m not a fan of crazy white supremacist folk, I do have to say that ASUO will be hard pressed to ban groups like this from the campus, especially if it’s not a blanket ban on all outside groups, and if the Pacifica Forum takes U of O to court, they’ll probably win. My campus dealt with similar issues last semester (only on a much, much smaller scale) when an anti-gay, anti-feminist, anti-drug etc. etc. preacher paid us an annual visit and all hell broke loose on campus (see my photos from my last post). As much as I hated the guy’s messages, they were all protected under the Constitution, as was his ability to speak on the university campus. It was utterly shocking to me how many people pushed for kicking him out because they didn’t understand that doing so would be a violation of the First Amendment.
Anyway, that’s my rant/input for the day. if you didn’t know about what happened at U of O, now you do. If you didn’t know crazies were allowed to be on public university campuses, well now you do. If you think I got any of my info wrong, or should’ve expanded more on something, let me know.
The second day of my second attempt to induce lactation. i chose a neat front fastening white bra with shoe-string straps that i “stole” from my Wife years ago when She outgrew it. i love this bra for it is great under a tee-shirt and shapes my breasts nicely. i chose a pair of white striped “boy-leg” panties with lace trim to go with the bra. i was not alone at work today so my underwear had to remain hidden beneath my male outer clothes. The presence of others around the office made nipple stimulation with the breast pump a little difficult also. my wife was at work though, and so the house was empty. i used the breast pump first thing after my wife had left for work and again when i made an excuse to go over to the house mid-morning and later at lunch time. i needed to go to the shops during the afternoon so took another opportunity to use the breast pump then. Once everyone had gone home, i was able to use the pump in the office, away from my wife who returned home as my workers left. All has to be very secretive. At least the domperidone can be easily taken. i decided today that i would take one every 3 hours making it 60mg during the day.
The breast pump really does make me horny. i just adore the sensation of my nipples being suckled and they send signals down to my genitalia as if they were hot-wired together. i know that inducing lactation is a major goal of mine but it will come at the price of becoming increasingly aroused with no hope of release due to my CB-2000 chastity device.
While i was out at the shops, i saw a pair of ladies reading glasses in a deep pastel pink colour on offer in a local store. The magnification was the same as my existing glasses and i could not resist the temptation – a bargain at just $6. i shall now be able to clean Mistress’ house without having to resort to my male glasses or my old pair of ladies glasses that do not hold together well and keep sliding off my nose.
Still no sign of Mistress Ana but had more emails today from Goddess Joyce – She has moved house which is why i had not heard from Her for a while – She has been busy packing, moving and unpacking. Hopefully She will soon be settled.
i added another of my Experiences to Experience Project today.
On: “I want to swap bodies”
There is absolutely nothing wrong with my body in terms of its health and fitness apart from the fact that i am imprisoned in it. i have come to accept and live within my male body over the years even though i hate it. i am undeniably female in my innermost self, i cry at movies and tend to get quite emotional over even relatively small issues. i can multi-task like most women and very few men and dislike male attitudes and macho behaviour even though i have had to grow up adopting such an outward appearance for my own protection, hiding my femininity beneath a macho male veneer. i have always preferred the company of girls and women, am interested in fashion, enjoy sewing, knitting, cooking and even household chores like cleaning, laundry and ironing i find acceptable. i do of course wear women’s clothes whenever i can and have an extensive wardrobe and footwear collection, i love shopping for clothes, even to the point of trying on women’s clothes and shoes before buying whether i am dressed as a male or female. But i am stuck with my male body and do sincerely wish i could swap it for a female one.
Many men ogle women and i confess i admire women with good figures but not from a sexual desire point of view like other men, i look at them in full admiration of their figure and pure jealousy, i want their body in exchange for mine. How frustrating it is to read of or see butch lesbian ladies desperately changing their figure and growing facial hair to be more masculine while i am doing the exact opposite. Oh wouldn’t it be wonderful if there were such a thing as a body exchange where these unfortunate males trapped in female bodies could swap with women like me who are stuck inside a male body they do not want? i read years ago of a husband and wife who both had gender reassignment, he becoming she and vice-versa so that they remained married and a couple but each finally found peace of mind in the body suited to their mindset or psyche. It was a wonderful article and it made me cry, tears of joy for the couple and of sadness for my ongoing dilemma.
i have dreamed that one day i am involved in a car crash in which my own body dies but not my brain whereas the other crash victim is a woman who’s brain dies but not her body and when i wake up from the nightmare crash and my nightmare life before it, i find that she has donated her body to me and that i have at last got the female body i have always wanted. The sad thing is that she would have to die; a body swap with a woman that wanted to be a man would be oh so much better and a win-win all round. Why can’t someone establish a sort of clearing house that will match people who wish to change sex so that they effectively do swap bodies?
Also, i came across a terrific lingerie sale on Ideeli and fell in love with this matching set of lingerie – i think it looks just gorgeous. They have it in other colours too!
Finally, on finishing work, i cooked dinner, did the dishes, finished the ironing and then helped my wife undress before returning to my office to have one more session on the breast pump and tidy up loose ends, always in the hope that Mistress Ana may just happen to be on line. Sadly not and i shall go to bed once again thinking anxiously of Her and hoping all is well with Her.
This post is the fourth post in a series of coverage from the Midwest Bisexual Lesbian Gay Transgender Ally College Conference 2010, that took place Feb. 19 to Feb. 21, 2010, at the University of Wisconsin – Madison.
